Yesterday was difficult. I had expected to be waiting around the hospital for an hour or two and then seeing Hannah and Ciara. Lovely. Well, as you all know by now that didn't happen. I think the only part of Hannah's birth plan that was adhered to was her desire not to involve formula milk. And of course, hospitals need to get with the 21st century, or the 22nd, or whenever is will be that poly relationships are considered normal. Conor was The Dad and was hence treated as the only important person around Hannah by the hospital staff - they seemed confused as to why Katy was there, and on the occasions when Simon and I were there they emitted strong "go away" vibes. So while Katy and Conor were in the hospital, Simon, Kate and I ended up spending most of the day in the park and fretting around Hannah's house. Grrrr.
Conor was very good about everything though - spotted the poly-vs-hospital issue without being prompted, did his level best to be as nice as possible (particularly to Katy), even gave me a hug. My opinion of him has shot up. Maybe everything's going to be all right after all...
And of course, hospitals need to get with the 21st century, or the 22nd, or whenever is will be that poly relationships are considered normal. Conor was The Dad and was hence treated as the only important person around Hannah by the hospital staff - they seemed confused as to why Katy was there, and on the occasions when Simon and I were there they emitted strong "go away" vibes. So while Katy and Conor were in the hospital, Simon, Kate and I ended up spending most of the day in the park and fretting around Hannah's house. Grrrr.
Hmm, in your shoes I'd have been tempted to nominate one of you to be presented as The Current Partner, and present Conor as The Ex. Then it would be something they were used to dealing with, though they might be surprised that Conor was there at all...
They did know Conor was her ex, though they might have forgotten as Hannah and Conor were being very partner-like. We had agreed that it was fine for me to be known as her girlfriend, but it wasn't especially easy to bring up in conversation so we kind of left it as me being her schoolfriend. Hannah and I were cuddling and kissing at various points, but then straight girls do that, so I'm really not sure what the hospital thought.
To be honest, I think the defining point was that Conor was Official Birth Partner, so he'd have got the most attention anyway - it wasn't so much about who she was sleeping with. They were nice to me, I'm just not sure they knew why I was there.
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branchandroot
(no subject)
Date: 2002-03-22 05:19 am (UTC)Conor was very good about everything though - spotted the poly-vs-hospital issue without being prompted, did his level best to be as nice as possible (particularly to Katy), even gave me a hug. My opinion of him has shot up. Maybe everything's going to be all right after all...
(no subject)
Date: 2002-03-22 05:38 am (UTC)This does not surprise me one jot.
However, glad to know that everyone's safe etc.
J
(no subject)
Date: 2002-03-22 06:00 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2002-03-23 03:08 am (UTC)To be honest, I think the defining point was that Conor was Official Birth Partner, so he'd have got the most attention anyway - it wasn't so much about who she was sleeping with. They were nice to me, I'm just not sure they knew why I was there.
(no subject)
Date: 2002-03-22 05:34 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2002-03-22 06:56 am (UTC)Congratulations on getting this far. Hospitals are trying places at te best of times.
Maybe everything's going to be all right after all...
I'm certain it will be.